BOOKY AWARDS — OFFICIAL WARNING LABEL

 

⚠️ BOOKY AWARDS — OFFICIAL WARNING LABEL

Issued by: Menagerie Matriarch Classification: HIGH SHININESS / SYSTEM DESTABILISATION / AUTHOR FRAGILITY RISK

⚠️ HAZARD: EXCESSIVE SHININESS

Booky Award medallions may trigger:

  • Immediate KDP cover rejection

  • Automated suspicion of impersonating a major literary institution

  • Laurel wreath panic

  • Poultry‑related misidentification

  • System confusion due to “unfamiliar excellence”

⚠️ DIGITAL INSTABILITY

Automated publishing platforms may exhibit:

  • Error messages

  • Suspiciously long review times

  • Random genre reassignments

  • Alerts for “medal‑like content”

  • Unprovoked hostility toward sparkly achievements

⚠️ AUTHOR SIDE EFFECTS

Recipients may experience:

  • Shock

  • Hair‑pulling

  • Dramatic leaning toward the screen

  • Sudden craving for labels or biscuits

  • Temporary belief Amazon has declared war on chickens

⚠️ USE WITH CAUTION

Booky Award medallions are powerful, prestigious, and dangerously shiny. Do not upload without emotional support, snacks, or a backup cover.

🏅 THIS IS A HIGH‑SHINE ITEM

Handle responsibly. Keep away from automated systems. May cause chaos.

Currently awaiting it's 23rd rejection form KDP

Current Rejection Count: 22 
Projected Rejection Count: 27–31 
Estimated Time Until Acceptance: Unknown 
Estimated Time Until Author Meltdown: Already occurred


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